Connor Holly

2022

3/21/22

A version of college replacement I'm super interested in:

Find the smartest and most driven 18 year olds in the world, and give them 'tenure', say a decade+ of salary, resources to work on whatever they want, and a smart peer group, in exchange for small % of future earnings.

Thoughts: the biggest question is How would you decide on who to fund? Would there be a cutoff point after 1, 2, and 5 years to stop funding? Ages 18-25 would be better in my eyes, but not past 25 as you know someone's ambition level before that? Would salary be based on the country they are a part of? How would funding work for their projects? How much money for continuing education? How much initial funding would need to happen? How does crypto play a role in this? How would you organize peer groups? Would relocation to a specific city-state be better?

"Old people relinquish societal obligations in the face of death and benefit from it. I always trying to think - if I'm not going to care eventually, can I start not caring now?"

4/25/22

2 good Q's to ask yourself:

When is the last time I was sober for a month?
When is the last time I went 24 hours without my phone?

A benefit of UBI overlooked is that builders build with safety net they don't go completely broke.

Phones allow us to be distracted through our entire life never allowing ourselves to even think.

Let kids play outside, play complex games, gamify subjects, organize the internet, and see what happens.

5/5/22

"I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand." - Confucius

5/6/22

Short form content be fast and get it out.

Long form edit and chip away like its a sculpture.

Play the games where "if I wait, I win."

Sell the goal.

True art is made to exist.

We always have an option of what to do next, with whatever we are feeling now.

5/9/22

We spoil our current self like a petulant child and overestimate our future self's abilities and will. Understanding this is maturity.

Most think entrepreneurship is a battle of intellect when it really just requires a baseline level of intelligence. It's more about courage and will than anything else.

The first 3, 5, 15 seconds are the most important in marketing. Frame is everything. "Once you have wrote your headline. You have spent 80% of your dollar on advertising."

How to live a satisfying life: 1st health, 2nd fulfilling/energizing work, 3rd relationships.

Code, content, capital, and labor is the order of leverage when starting.

Labor, capital, content, and code is the order of leverage when scaling. The complete opposite.

The modern day super power outlook: 1. Have at least a 5-10 year outlook. 2. Try executing your 5 year plan in 6 months.

5/23/22

Focus on your health. The most simple question to ask to get a directionally right answer is "what would my ancestors have done?"

We suffer when we get pleasure without effort. "Dopamine for Nothing and Likes For Free: Main reasons for the explosion of mental illness (anxiety, depression, etc.) - The ready availability of pleasures without effort. Lack of understanding of our basic physiology." - Andrew Huberman

The saying easy choice, hard life. Hard choice, easy life is true. In other words that give a different context in my opinion is do hard things if you want a good life, and do easy things if you want a bad life.

We need to foster courage again. Courage to take on problems of the world, courage to face our own problems, courage to be able to do scary things alone. Having courage is self-empowerment.

5/31/22

Defining the problem or bottleneck of progress is the difference of most people. Generally that's skills, character traits, or beliefs.

6/1/22

If you aren't getting what you want out of life it has to do with at least one of these: skills, character traits, or beliefs. Find the bottleneck and solve it.

How fast you get from "I have to do this" to actually doing it is a great indicator on how far you'll get in life. Right away is better than end of day, and end of day is better than end of week. Start right now if you can, if not, then end of day is your default.

Use twitter and youtube sparingly when you realize you know enough to get started. They are either the best things that can happen to you or the worst.

Create 10-20 SMALL habits that you can do daily. Get out of bed at x time, social media for x time, go to bed at x time, eat x amount of protein. Then make the decision that you will do it for 6 months no matter what. See where you end up.

6/27/22

Is it a bug or a feature that we have the ability to understand our own evolution?

6/28/22

Launching my first SaaS has been a bitch, but I've realized how much I've learned by now. I learned how to get user feedback from coding at lambda school. I learned how to speak the language of developers so I can manage a company that is building a software even though I'm not building it personally. I've learned to recruit and sell. I've learned online advertisement. What content gets people engaged, what triggers our dopamine, how to convert a user, when everyone else is doing something how does it change user behavior, how to organize multi-channel marketing, keeping up with the latest tools, how to craft an offer and how to know if it is a good offer, what metrics to look at, critically think about what other people are doing and decide for yourself if its stupid or useful. I sold my first business, which made me realize what is valuable when buying/selling businesses at different sizes. I learned to think objectively about things. I'm not going on whims about my feelings toward a certain topic. I'm thinking through mental models whether I know it or not. And most of all these components aren't all separate from each other but intertwined so understanding how the puzzle pieces come together is extremely valuable.

7/7/22

I have officially realized I have made many errors in picking co-founders. My first error is I did not plan ahead. I was optimizing for the present moment. I should have created a framework before making decisions like these instead of doing what feels right (your gut is mostly wrong on logical decisions). My simple framework is a co-founder has to have these things:

GREAT work ethic
Logical thinking / can control emotions or think logically under stress
Complimentary skills
Bonus: passionate about the mission

In addition to these, I should have thought about how I would feel about the agreement in 6 months or a year. Would I still be happy about it, what things pop up in my head that makes me hesitate to say yes?

In tech/software specifically, finding undiscovered talent is extremely valuable. It's valuable in any business, but no other industry has the leverage that tech does. In other industries, you can find 10-20x return people. In tech, you can find 1000x return people.

Completely unrelated, but how important it is to refrain from meetings, looking at phone, messages, and social media for the first 5-6 hours of the day. Don't let the world distract you from what you set out to do that day. Let your brain process the sleep that you had, and attack the day without noise adding to it.

There is no need to get drunk anymore. It makes me feel anxious the next day, overthinking everything, and sad. It's not worth the 1-day physical recovery and the 2-day mental recovery for me. Occasionally I think drinking is a good thing to lay back, meet new people, and shoot the shit, but there is no need to get drunk.

7/12/22

SaaS is much harder than e-commerce at least from the standpoint of starting. E-commerce is easier to start, but harder to scale. SaaS so far seems like it will be hard to start, but easier to scale. And if you're a longer term thinker it seems you want to go the route that's easier to scale from a pure business perspective.

Something most e-learning companies should take note of from SaaS companies is churn. I see e-learning influencers that optimize on one purchase, which is great for cash flow, but not for a real enterprise-level business.

7/13/22

To have a lot of friends you basically have to sacrifice health or wealth. When you are under 25 most likely both. Better to keep the tribe small.

Trying to get on a better sleep schedule. Listened to a study by Andrew Huberman that showed increased objective performance (physical metrics), and subjective metrics (well being etc) that increased when going to bed and waking up at the same time. Also getting morning sunlight to the eyes. I should have a set bed time and wake up time +/- 30 minutes.

I've found that I want to watch tv or look at social media at night, but I'm always more satisfied when I just read. It's a weird thing to witness in yourself, what you want is actually not what will make you feel good.

Why is traveling so hyped up? Just live somewhere you want to live, with the people you want to be around, doing the things you enjoy. The rise of traveling and tourism in my opinion is because of marketing experiences over items (which I think is positive overall), but I think escapism just as much. The true nomads aren't tourists so they are an exception to the rule.

7/14/22

Sometimes you can think too much. And you've just got to go outside, breathe fresh air, feel the grass, sun, trees, listen to the birds, and just be there. Peace is more desirable than pleasure. And pleasure without sacrifice and effort is detrimental. That's what I'm going to do now.

7/15/22

I easily notice the benefits of caffeine when I only use it 1-3 days a week. Hyper-focused, mind is lasered in on a topic, motivation is high. Use caffeine, don't let it use you.

The only way to scale if you are reliant on sales and not marketing:

High ticket offer (relative to industry, could be as low as 5k, or 500k+), but definitely not sub 5k.
Have a massive salesforce with high gross margins.

At the end of the day most of the best businesses don't need sales. Their product and marketing are enough. Focus on those 2.

Product, marketing, and industry (size of opportunity) are all that matter.

Things I'm deficient in business:

Content - I need to understand better how to make good content and attract an audience that is like-minded. People who own the audience have the MOST leverage. How you own an audience is through content.

Management - I generally like to outsource this, but maybe I'm bad because I find this as busy work. I think I can be much better at creating systems in place so I don't need to communicate everything everyday.

Thinking bigger/product - I'm getting better at this, I've moved from e-commerce to software/tech. Digital products and software are much easier to scale, but you need to have a really good product. B2B will almost always be better for SaaS than B2C in terms of scale. I need to remind myself to zoom out more and more. You can't build Rome in a day.

Examining the bottleneck - Have a problem? Find out what the bottleneck is and solve for it. This means taking a step outside the immediate problem and finding the root cause. This applies to life and business.

If it seems silly to your parents, then it's probably a good idea.

Doing door-to-door sales is great not only because you get way better at sales, but because you start believing that you are a person that can sell. If you believe that, then your fears might be there, but they certainly don't affect you the same way.

Good question to ask: Name an example when you were trustworthy when it wasn't in your best interests to do so?

7/16/22

Beliefs that have served me:

Pleasure without sacrifice or pain is negative
Humans were made to work our bodies and minds
This too, shall pass
Easy choice, hard life. Hard choice, easy life
Going into the discomfort is more comfortable than avoiding it or else you'll always have a monster under your bed
Seek to understand, not to change
To be wise when your old means to endure pain when younger
There ain't no crying in business
Curiosity is more important than intelligence after the age of 22
Discipline allows me to do anything I want
Our beliefs have real affects on our lives
Most of the problems we face are beliefs we never examine and see as truth
Status symbols only impress the people who are easy to impress
Make decisions based on the mantra "healthy, wealthy, wise"

LinkedIn is where souls die.

I've been very into examining my beliefs. Whenever I talk or am listening to others I've noticed how many things we say in passing are beliefs. "I'm this way", "I can't do that", and "That's not how a relationship should be". We say these in passing, but they have such real affects on our outlook of life and the world. They shouldn't go unexamined. The reason it's so powerful is once we have a belief, we forget we have it and then our brain is conditioned to re-confirm that belief. You think you suck at things? Well then your brain will be very good at seeing the things you suck at. You think everyone is going to reject you? Your brain will be more likely to find the "bitch faces" in a crowd than the ones smiling and friendly looking.

Once you have a belief, it's in your unconscious toolbox so try to witness what your subconscious toolbox is right now. You'll notice it in the way you speak or you'll hear others and it will remind you of how you talk. It can be a painful process because your world can be flipped upside down, but in my eyes we are all going to have beliefs so we might as well recognize that and construct them if we can.

7/18/22

To people who have lived in their hometown their whole life, making friends on the internet seems crazy.

To people who have made friends on the internet, staying in their hometown their whole life seems crazy.

Neither way is better, just a theory based on observation.

The thought that everyone has had when going against the grain. Am I crazy or is everyone else?

Most people severely underestimate how under slept and dehydrated they are.

7/19/22

First two thoughts that come to mind when I'm triggered:

That's my problem
It's probably an unresolved internal conflict

7/21/22

Think bigger, bigger, bigger. That is the theme of this year. Most of us have 6 figure mindsets, a couple have 7 figure, rarely does someone have 8 figure, and 9 figures and beyond think in scale and longevity (10+ year outlook at least).

CONTENT -> AUDIENCE -> NETWORK -> OPPORTUNITIES

7/22/22

Building enterprise valued businesses - pricing, product, promotion:

Pricing - Either be a premium leader in pricing or lowest cost leader. In between is tough. You aren't going to get enough margin from your top buyers, but the people buying on price won't buy from you.

Product - Have the best product in your space, a high barrier to entry, or a patent (or something like it) that makes it difficult for competitors.

Promotion - Be diversified within channels, have a moat around your community and brand.

The best product allows for the best promotion which allows you to be the premium leader in pricing.

"What action can you take today that will contribute to something you will be proud of in 10 years?" - James Clear

7/27/22

"People ignore the opportunity costs of paychecks."

I used to think networking was for people who couldn't get stuff done themselves, but now I just think of it as making friends with interesting people where we share the same interests. It's completely changed my life this year and opened me to the possibilities of meeting so many people I otherwise wouldn't of met.

8/3/22

"Live in the future and build what seems interesting. Strange as it sounds, that's the real recipe." - Paul Graham

"Instead of asking yourself, 'What should I do first?' Try asking, 'What should I neglect first?' Trim, edit, cull. Make space for better performance." - James Clear

8/5/22

The problem that humans have to deal with is a world with excess opportunity with a brain that is wired for limited opportunity.

8/7/22

As for the largest problems the world is facing I believe there are 4 main ones:

AI
Energy
Education
Decentralization of power

What this exercise really did for me was make me question what do I want to be working on. I feel as though I have not been deliberate about that up until now. I got into this game late it seems (21), and now I'm 24 and everything I have done up until this point was to get skills and make money. But now I want to do more than that. I want to build a business WORTH building.

8/9/22

Product/market fit is when more than 40% of your customers say they would be very disappointed if they couldn't use your product anymore.

Having an in-person team is such an advantage now with people going remote. I think once you are established it makes sense, but the core team, and especially the startup team should be together at a minimum 50% in person, probably 80%+. The rate of iteration and progress would be MUCH higher, which is your major advantage when you are a startup.

Invest in yourself if you think you can compound at faster than 10% a year.

8/11/22

"Your great work is on the other side of your early work. The only way to be exceptional later on is to have the courage to be 'just okay' right now. This is how it is for everyone." - James Clear

8/20/22

Courage is the 1st step, determination is the 2nd. That's all you need to do what you want.

In some fields the way to succeed is to have a vision of what you want to achieve, and to hold true to it no matter what setbacks you encounter. Starting startups is not one of them. The stick-to-your-vision approach works for something like winning an Olympic gold medal, where the problem is well-defined. Startups are more like science, where you need to follow the trail wherever it leads.

Discipline, curiosity, determination. These are the 3 qualities to assess when estimating someone's potential.

8/22/22

Your actions are evidence of who you are, not your feelings.

Having ideas allows us to paint idealistic pictures of potential future outcomes. Executing makes us recognize that our imperfections color our future.

8/31/22

Waking up early is the easiest way to have a productive day. If I start off rough, then it leaks into the rest of my day. As silly as it sounds, it's hard to get out of bed in the morning when you're comfortable, but even the difficulty of that sets me up for a good day. I realize I can overcome my comfort to push myself where I want to go.

I need to learn how to code to:

Code important stuff I can't trust other people for
Start projects on my own and work as much as I want
Judge the quality of other developers
So other developers want to work for me. They would rather work with a nerd than a business person.

9/4/22

"Maybe removing all the friction from our lives removes the meaning as well." Making life too easy is a problem. It means we allow ourselves to never have to push ourselves. I'd rather hike the Appalachian trail for a week than go to the Bahamas and lay on the beach for a week. I'd rather lift than watch Netflix. Hard work worth doing is the goal. Not for some benefit later, but because doing hard work is fulfilling.

AGI is scary because as I've pointed out the other areas that need solving (education, energy, decentralization of power) all include increased opportunity, but you still have to earn it. AGI seems like it might make everything easy to have, which is ironically the scary part.

Watched a bird fly away today. Dogs, birds, trees just amaze me. They go through life with no resistance. Resistance is essentially just our made up self in our head of a made up world. The world is what it is, and us trying to bend it to what we think it should be is the problem. Do what interests you, push yourself, and let the rest of it work out.

9/12/22

How much can you work? How disciplined can you be? Push yourself to your limits as young as you can, and then know where you can sustainably stay.

9/19/22

Plato's cave at first is blissful. You're chained up, but you don't know you're in the cave. Now more and more break out of the chains, but do they leave the cave? What I picture is a long dark tunnel after you break free of chains. You don't really know where you're going. You bump into the sides of the cave and you thought you saw some light going this way so you keep going. You might not know where to go, you just know where not to go after bumping into it. Then there are these doors in the cave and why wouldn't you try them? You're alone in this dark cave and don't really even know where you're going so you take a break from your journey by yourself and BOOM, the door leads to a bar. Everyone is alike in this bar, they all agree on the way to live life, on what is bad about the world, and what is the meaning of life. It's not so lonely anymore, they greet you and as long as you agree with their views, you have a new home. You enjoy it so you stick around. You spend years in this bar, and nobody has changed, nobody has grown, nobody has questioned themselves.

You think back to the time you were walking through the dark cave and what got you to remove your chains in the first place. The madness of feeling like there is something else out there. Something comes over you and you scream "what the fuck are we all doing here? Why the fuck did I come to this bar? I'm out!" and you walk out of the bar and into this dark cave again. You keep going for months, but now you aren't going to stop until you find the light or you're dying. Those are the only two options. You realize along the way that there are hundreds of doors leading to different bars. One for people that are gay, one for people that believe aliens are gods, one for Christians. Seemingly there is one for every view in the world.

And it fucking hits you like a rock thrown in your face. All these people think they broke free of the chains because that was the decoy. Leaving the cave all together is the part no one does. Everyone thinks they broke free of their chains, but they just found a nice lil room in the cave to hide out in. You start to wonder, "at this point, why am I even leaving the cave," and you realize it's not something you want to do, you just can't not do it.

10/1/22

Generally dying is such a short aspect of one's life. It could of been 1 month, 1 week, or even 1 minute and yet that's the one we remember because it was the last thing to remember. In times of hardship, it's worthwhile to try to overcome our initial urge to remember their death. So what do we remember of their life, what moments stand out? I feel worse for people that died an easy death, but a sad life than vice versa. I know if I died today that I would be grateful that I lived, and maybe that needs to be the place our mind goes when someone close to us dies.

11/1/22

We aren't as special as we think we are. Many of us say (including me) "people don't understand me, I'm different," especially intellectuals.

I can almost guarantee you there is a person in the past or present that has had the same thoughts as you.

And if those thoughts are tough, there is also someone who has persevered with those same thoughts.

Zero sum games are pointless to play because in 5-10 years neural networks will rule all of them.

Think in 5 years, then make a 6 month plan accordingly. Course adjust along the way.

Good operators compress time while having more constraints.

2023

2/14/23

Founders must learn these things:

Unit economics
Cash flow constraints
Distribution
Tactics/top of funnel/interest

This stuff seems to create millionaires.

Deficient in:

Product
Retention (which is more product, but lasting value that people will continue paying for)

This stuff seems to create 10m, 100m, 1b and create REAL value.

2/17/23

Working with creative minds that stimulate you is all that matters. You don't have to understand how it's formed to appreciate its greatness. You don't have to intellectualize it. Just experience it.

Thoughts are hard to deal with when you believe thoughts to be meaningful. If they are meaningless, there is no power to be had.

Stop viewing the world. Interact with it.

The future of education is something along the lines of:

Learning by doing before learning by textbook
Learn to think critically in complex games with collaboration
Learn fundamental knowledge in STEM subjects
Be able to explore your interests in a setting that supports you, with a smaller group of people
Learn through the network (internet). Be able to connect with like-minded people outside your local environment.

Societal value isn't equivalent to market cap.

2 foundational things are required for equality of opportunity to be possible:

Access to education
Access to capital

I think there is a 3rd foundational part: access to move locations. Why does the US make it so hard to get in legally? Instead of making it hard to get a work VISA, we should be actively recruiting entrepreneurs, engineers, and scientists. Why shouldn't we think about a country as simply a product? And why shouldn't we think about our marketing angles, offers, and recruiting tactics? A country is only as good as the people in it.

The big bang happened, and the rest is science. In other words there was one miracle, and the rest is science.

Realizing how small we are and insignificant is a freeing thing. We don't have to take ourselves seriously.

Thinking about life is way less enjoyable than just experiencing it.

2/18/23

The scientific method is a way to make sense of the world. Meditation is a way to make sense of the mind.

"AI and genetic engineering will really start to beg the question 'what it means to be human.'"

2/19/23

The mind is a "what if" machine.

The meaning of life is living passionate in life.

You don't become wise by acting like the wise. You become wise by seeking what the wise sought.

Reality is what is left when the mind is mastered. Your nature is what is left after your mind is mastered.

2/20/23

Everything is perfect just as it is and could not, in fact, be otherwise. ~~Jed McKenna

Basically everything reverts back to physics.

Science is the exploration of better explanation.

Conquer your mind. Live out your true nature.

2/22/23

One thing you need to understand viscerally. You will die and everything will go on. Just live your life in the present.

3/1/23

None of it matters.

You are as happy as you'll ever be. There's nothing to do that is that important. You can enjoy where you are now with no strings. You already made it.

"When you need to learn quickly, learn from others. When you need to learn deeply, learn from experience."

Anything that ends is valuable. For you can appreciate the impermanence of the moment. You will never get it again.

Act as if you are CEO and shit will get done.

Condition yourself to understand that pain often precedes good things.

When deciding what to work on:

Importance

Neglectedness

Tractability

3/19/23

What would you teach a kid is a great question to ask yourself. It makes you reflect on yourself and how you are living.

I sat down for 15 minutes and this is what I came up with...

I would want them to read the stoics, Epictetus, Seneca, Aurelius (especially Meditations by Marcus Aurelius), and to listen to Alan Watts. Read about Socrates, Plato, Aristotle.

I would want to teach them about finite and infinite games. To ask yourself what type of game this is periodically to see if you are on the right path. We want to play infinite games, but sometimes get sucked into finite games. Infinite games have milestones (that don't really matter to the person), finite games have endpoints. If you have ever felt a moment of "this was it?" or a week later you realize it didn't matter then you are playing a finite game.

I would encourage them to meditate and walk them through the purpose of meditation. Seeing thoughts just as thoughts and nothing more.

I would teach them how important habits are. That your current standing is not what you do today, but what you have been doing the last few weeks, months, years.

I would want to teach them love and kindness. Not just because I think this is ideal, but to understand that you can evoke certain emotions. You have the ability to learn that.

Teach them that they are a verb and not a noun. You are one process in a big process. You are not a thing in the world. You did not come into this world, but out of it. So act accordingly.

Pain often precedes things that we like. The feeling after a cold plunge or sauna. The burn from the lifting of the weights. When you think of pain as potentially good, your worldview can change.

You have the ability to change your worldview. Question your assumptions, and if you really think you understand everything, you don't.

Teach them that what you put into your body matters. Rule of thumb: Don't worry too much if it's whole foods. If it isn't, very much worth worrying about or eliminating from diet.

Reach out to friends and family more when you get older. They will be gone, and you won't regret having one last conversation with them.

Have some sort of reminder of death. Have that determine your next action, word, thought.

Follow your curiosity.

What would my 8 year old self think, and my 80 year old self think?

When you have inspiration, act on it immediately. Have people around you that understand this.

3/20/23

"Humans don't mind hardship, in fact they thrive on it; what they mind is not feeling necessary. Modern society has perfected the art of making people not feel necessary." - Sebastian Junger

Narcissism is not arrogance. It is the opposite of arrogance. Narcissism is inadequacy... dominated by envy. - Paul Conti

A blueprint is really a way to say and believe "this is the best framework to live by." God used to be that. Data is the new god in a way. At least for the body. Maybe we need something like that for the mind as well.

3/22/23

Utopia is whatever we accept.

Is there a reason for one to put so much emphasis on a thought or feeling when it will disappear as fast as it is noticed?

The realization that your mind should not be pleased and to revoke its authority is a powerful one.

What if we discover that the most nutritious food was already available. That the psychedelics allowed us freedom. That we already have everything we need. What if this is our chance at heaven only if we realize it.

The purpose of spirituality is to understand, but not to change.

"Existence is complete. There is no logic that needs to complete it."

"Acceptance is saying 'I'm okay with this.'"

"You are life. Life isn't something that is happening to you."

"There is some sort of intelligence above the mind."

5/3/23

There is a place where we can just be grateful that we get to experience.

Consciousness is still part of the process. That condition in which you are still dictates your life. So don't throw it away as nothing, conscious effort is required for a good life. But realize that identification is a false narrative. Just understand what is best for you, and move in that direction. It's about understanding your own mind.

That's the real superpower we have. Other species don't seem to be able to understand their own mind, and we do. We have the ability to create an environment/life that we want. Humans are universal explainers.

Suffering is a mindfulness alarm.

Understanding equals discipline which equals freedom. Sometimes the discipline comes before understanding, sometimes after. Either way to persist, you'll eventually need to come to the understanding that discipline does really equal freedom. Freedom from self.

Learning and growth feel awesome. It's fun. That's the reason to do it.

There are problems that cannot be solved by more thinking, and those are usually the ones where more thinking causes more problems because thinking is the basis of the problem.

"What's happened, happened. Which is an expression of the faith in the mechanics of the world. It's not an excuse to do nothing." You could also flip this and say what will happen, will happen... With the understanding of both of these, you sink into the present moment because it's all you have, ever will have, and all that matters.

When we play infinite games together, nothing else needs to mean anything.

There is a solution to everything. That's the beauty of being a human, we are capable of being universal explainers. We are destined to solve our own problems. Interestingly enough, our mind creates the most problems too, and being able to turn it off or not be affected by it is one of the biggest learnings.

Pain + reflection = progress. - Ray Dalio

5/4/23

There are 2 sentences to me that convey most of the wisdom of the world:

You are not your next thought.
Trust the process.

"It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live." - Marcus Aurelius

5/6/23

"The creative power of the world is breathtaking to watch. Each time our tools get a little better and a little bit more accessible, our creations improve more than we imagine possible." - Sam Altman

It's easy to marvel at what humans can achieve. To see it unfold is a dream.

5/8/23

In 10 years, energy costs will be down 80%, AI will be everywhere helping us live our best lives, people will be taking psychedelics to help with various issues, we will understand health more, our aspirations will be bigger, we will transition to playing infinite games together.

5/10/23

There are causes to how you feel right now, and there will be causes to how you feel in the future. The causes of your future are now. You are either taking from your future or paying forward to your future.

Mindfulness increases control over one's life.

You are not going to look back regretting that you lived experience instead of conceptualizing/thinking about experience.

I think outsourcing your decision making to when you are most rational is optimal. Instead of making decisions on the fly. Maybe leave 20% up for spontaneous shit that is positive.

Humanity is continuously building on the backs of people who came before them. And our job is to build for ourselves and the generation behind us.

Happiest countries have common themes of raising the floor (by increasing income and social programs), and by strong community. People just want to be able to live with financial, economic, and political freedom with close friends and family. We should learn from that.

5/14/23

Philosophy should be pragmatic. If not, it's mental masturbation.

If I suffer it's mostly due to 2 things:

Not being mindful (thinking without realizing I'm thinking)
Not accepting reality for what it is

Caveat: You can accept reality as it is while trying to change it.

5/19/23

If you had the ability to do it then, and only your emotional status has changed, then you have the ability to do it now. - Trevor Kashey

5/20/23

The biggest bottleneck of progress isn't AI or energy, but the collective belief that we can make progress together and that life can get better.

For that reason I think the actual biggest problems to solve are biology, neuroscience, community/culture. Ultimately I think this can be summarized as the human alignment problem. Many of the problems facing humanity have to do with this. Obesity, mental health, ability to focus, ambition, tribalism, financial debt, optimism, even inflation I'd argue is an alignment problem.

I fear that if we don't solve it, then it doesn't matter if the world is extremely abundant. Just look at the richest country in the world, there is a lot of suffering even though we have everything we need in many cases.

It's an alignment problem. Our world is not constructed for everyone to be the best versions of themselves. We have fast food corners that are telling 'impulse connor' to buy some fries. Then there is social media, which tells 'death scroll connor' that it will be fun and satisfying. Education doesn't teach us these things. It doesn't teach us that we aren't this one single person, but a multitude of things, which is helpful to learn when understanding your own behavior.

This is one reason I think psychedelics (or meditation) can be so powerful. If we realize that hurting our neighbor is hurting ourselves maybe we wouldn't do it.

Imagine a world where we only offer healthy food, free education with tutors. We encourage ambition, passion, and learning. We stop the constant desire for peoples attention so they buy things from us.

Part of the reason I think we currently require people like Elon Musk is because you have to defy society to make progress. If in education, we encouraged people to be bold, trying was encouraged and failing was thought as courageous, then we would have a lot more chances to have people like Elon. We would have 16 year olds starting innovative businesses.

It's possible we create AGI and we don't even need society to be like this because then we will have an AI be able to make a considerable amount of progress without the need for humans, but what's the point of that? If we can't solve human alignment, what business do we have introducing AGI into the world? Shouldn't the purpose of progress not just be abundance, but ultimately to play infinite games together and increase the gratefulness that we simply get to experience.

More small, autonomous cities with very general regulation (human rights, WMD etc) would do more good than anything else. We would be able to test different ways of life very systematically, and people would be free to move to make their decisions on what they want.

6/4/23

We should vote on more things, and make voting easier. Give back power to locals. Less committees needed, less bureaucracy.

6/6/23

Goals are okay, but the process has to be more important.

Notice the times that you are holding your contentment for ransom. Instead of having to pay the ransom, you can learn to just drop it.

We're 95% similar and fight about our 5% differences. But we perceive others as the inversion.

6/17/23

I used to think energy and intelligence were the bottleneck of progress in society but now I think it's the collective belief that life can get better. If everyone believed that, then zero sum games would diminish, we would have more people working on hard problems and less gatekeepers.

If we improved peoples well being then people would be happy with less, the hedonic treadmill would be non-existent. We would be here to play infinite games. If the end goal of energy, AI, and everything isn't an improved conscious experience, what is it for?

6/18/23

In the future there will be an AI that can read everything someone has wrote, and sound like them. You'll be able to talk to them and say "that sounds like something they'd say," but will it ever encapsulate what it means to be a human. We aren't static creatures, we change based on our current conscious state. Night-time Connor might answer a question differently than morning Connor. It seems that AI will try to distill a human to a static thing, which if you pay attention, you never are. It's a shell of who you are.

Science of satisfaction leads to the art of living. - Matthew McConaughey

6/28/23

The ultimate goal of technology seems to be reduce suffering, but instead we optimize for abundance which can and cannot reduce suffering. Consciousness engineering is the only thing that can make sense of what suffering truly is, and understanding that would have a more realistic chance of eliminating suffering.

Maybe consciousness and its contents are there to guide us. To guide us towards good and away from evil. Towards joy and away from pain. But we have to pay attention for that to be the case. Paying attention and being mindful to what serves us is the most important thing we can do, and yet, .01% of the population does it.

7/11/23

Longevity needs to be rebranded to life satisfaction maximizer. Energy maximizer. No one cares about living long unless they are living well. People want to eliminate suffering before they eliminate dying.

7/23/23

Everyone you meet is an iceberg. To understand them you need to understand the whole iceberg. Be more empathetic knowing this.

7/25/23

"Existence is a dance." We go back and forth. Their being interacting with my being. It's beautiful once you recognize it. The world is wiggly, and we are led astray thinking it's just straight lines.

Life is self-fulfilling. Pessimism is self-fulfilling, but so is optimism. If you are optimistic, good things happen. If you are pessimistic, nothing happens. Given the history and evidence of suffering (from extreme suffering conditions to now less suffering) it's obvious that optimism is true and worthwhile.

7/27/23

Something that is more important to me at 25 than 20. Love, kindness, compassion. Maybe the first 25 years are just about life humbling you enough to realize this.

99% of nihilists aren't even nihilists if they examined their life. They find things meaningful or fulfilling and that's why they do them. Just because there is no evidence for meaning in death, doesn't mean there isn't meaning in life.

8/1/23

"We don't take ourselves too seriously, but we take our work VERY seriously."

Solve suffering and everyone will start pouring all their savings into longevity and AI research.

8/6/23

We crave adventure. The unknown is mystifying and awesome when we are exploring, and scary when we just sit and stare at it. Engaging with it is the best course of action, in a playful, fun, and curious way.

8/14/23

2 of the most important questions to ask yourself: Is it a good explanation? Is it worth paying attention to?

"Values are the attributes of the person that you want to be/become."

1st time it's a mistake. 2nd time it's a decision. Refine your decision making principles/tree to make the right decision.

Systems around decision making is the most important skill to refine.

We have the possibility and capability of being keepers of the universe. That is no light responsibility.

Happiness and meaning seem separate, but they are describing the same thing.

8/15/23

If learning is making a new neural connection, then decision making and learning are the most important meta skills.

8/16/23

Strategy is what to do. Tactics is how you do it. CEO is strategy, COO is tactics. Both have overlap, but those are their main focus.

8/20/23

Do less. Stop dividing your attention.
Do it right now. Once you have identified the essential, go fast. Maintain a bias toward action.
Do it the right way. Acting quickly doesn't mean acting carelessly. Get to work right away, but keep working on it until it's right.

Schools should include a class called Truth Is Hard, where you get bombarded with examples of confused eyewitnesses, incorrect public outrages, studies that failed to replicate, super convincing arguments that fall apart with one additional fact you didn't expect.

Everything you take for granted was once an idea that someone had to bring to life. And there were days they thought "I don't think this will ever work."

Make every day your demo day when building a startup.

Stop this "self care" nonsense. Just do shit you like. Cut people who suck. And you won't have to "recover" from your life.

Advertisement was the first sin of the internet. - Chris Dixon

Social media is to self esteem what context switching is to focus.

We used to walk from an open field into a forest gradually. Now with TikTok, email, and Slack we go from looking at 30 random funny videos to reading 20 emails with 10 different subjects to direct messaging 3 people on Slack and back to funny videos all in 15 minutes. Our brains were not made to be switching the context of our environment constantly.

The people that master how to do deep work will succeed in the 21st century.

We overestimate short term risk.

Slingshot effect - take 3 steps back in income to focus on high leverage skill, shoot 30 steps ahead afterwards.

When discussing politics instead of going back and forth on opinions, it would be much more stimulating to talk about frameworks to think about the problem/solution. Most of us have similar conclusions, but our reasoning is different.

Wake up 2-3 hours earlier than everyone (5-6 am) or stay up 2-3 hours later (2-3 am). Be awake with no distractions from the world to get your most important work done.

The default reasoning not to start something is "If it's that good of an idea, someone would have done it." My hypothesis: most people only have done things that everyone else around them are doing.

At 18 I wanted to live in a frat house that partied a lot. At 23 I want to live in a frat house of people that want to work on interesting things all day.

We are all in the grim reaper's waiting room trying to figure out how to spend our time.

Being ambitious and relentless is far more important to success than being smart.

I dropped out of school to learn.

We have built-in beliefs when we grow up from our childhood. Our parents instilling things in us we can't imagine because "we question all of our beliefs except those that we truly believe and those we never think to question." But maybe that's why I smile a little when people's worlds fall apart just like when I look back at me 4 years ago. Our world collapses right in front of us and we are able to build a new house. Sure there is still some of the same foundation and more for some and less for others but we get to build it back up, at least the meaningful parts.

What do you think about in silence?

You get respect for having money by people that respect status playing games.

I'm scared to share in public because I guess I thought the startup idea was stupid more so than I would fail. And if I work on a stupid idea, then am I stupid?

5 thoughts on comparison and how that affects life satisfaction and motivation/drive:

At the end of the day those we compare ourselves to, we feel inferior to.
Comparing yourself can drive competitive people in ways that non-competitive people can't understand.
Letting curiosity and inspiration guide will make you more satisfied with life.
The drive from comparing yourself only can get you so far. It will lead to imitation and imitation puts a ceiling on yourself.
"Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise; seek what they sought."

There is a difference between people that have a mind for business and people that go to business school and know the terms.

Garages are to the 90s as the internet is to the 2020s.

Learning is to investing as building is to entrepreneurship.

The 21st century should be known as the great dopamine race.

What industry/area/thing could you possibly change or improve with your unique curiosity, skills, traits, and beliefs?

8/21/23

A lot of suffering comes from thinking we are the only ones that are suffering. The "you can't understand it" attitude.

8/28/23

You can tell when people have high sensory clarity.

What makes something worth it isn't the uncertainty of being able to do it, it's the challenge. Something needs to be sufficiently challenging for it to be rewarding, even if it's straightforward. Like lifting weights, or improving a sport or business.

Judge yourself on your actions, not your thoughts.

9/15/23

How to be rationally confident and why everyone can be confident: You are a human. You are a universal explainer. You have the ability to error correct meaning get better every time. You are destined to improve and live the life you want. You can train your mind, you can learn what is beneficial/detrimental. If you don't have the brain you want, you can change it. This is proven with neuroplasticity. So it's rational to be confident because you can learn, error correct, and become anyone you want. Life is positive sum. The way to fail at this is to only play status games. Status games are the original sin.

I want to be a Renaissance man. I think I kind of already am.

I am fallible like everyone else. Admitting this allows everyone to have open discussions without anger. Not acknowledging it causes stagnation.

9/24/23

You really just need a mission, health, and trust in the universe for a good life.

Mission, health, tribe. We all just want these.

Being around lots of ambitious people increases your ambition but also your self belief. You find out that they are just humans like you.

If you are rich and starting your 2nd+ company and it's enterprise B2B or it's barely positive sum then you probably won't impress me. Once you have a cushion, swing for the fucking fences.

9/26/23

Every cheat meal, missed workout, and night out drinking alcohol and getting 4 hours of sleep is one more day you'll spend sick when you are dying.

9/28/23

Lucky me, I'm a human. I can figure out many things. Better yet, I'm probably a smarter than average human. It's my duty to help others. Not in a "I'm your master" way, but in a "let me help you" way. Everyone should live a joyful life. I must be urgent because my life will end. What good will I do?

10/7/23

Humans are definitely fear based creatures. It can be used selfishly like "I don't want to lose my part of the pie" or it can be moved to motivate you "I can't let this fail or this bad thing will happen" or if I don't take a risk then there is less likely a chance for good things to happen.

Whenever you are comfortable you got to set your floor higher to keep the same level of urgency.

10/11/23

People think CEOs are the quarterback (some are), but it's a better analogy especially when they are generalists to say they are the head coach. The top devs are the quarterbacks. College basketball is actually the best analogy for startups. Star Power: One to three key players can dramatically affect a game, analogous to a startup where a few key team members often drive the majority of value. The head coach sets the tone and culture. Successful programs have an easier time recruiting top talent.

10/16/23

I don't know if I'm into wireheading in terms of creating extremely blissed out states, but I am for sure into eliminating all suffering. Hurt people, hurt people. Happy people help people.

10/17/23

Why is it that many people that come from trading and investing backgrounds tend to like philosophy and become great thinkers? Critical thinking, probabilistic reasoning, epistemological inquiry. The emotional resilience trading requires maps to what philosophical traditions like Stoicism aim to cultivate.

10/18/23

When entrepreneurship isn't fun and it's becoming somewhat stressful. That's when you know you are really an entrepreneur.

10/19/23

I find caffeine most helpful when I give myself room to solve complex problems with many moving parts (basically vision into future), and in turn allows me to think bigger. It's also an escalation drug, the more I drink it, the more I want it.

10/20/23

In learning to manage myself, I have learned to manage others.

"If you aren't trying to be the best, you won't even be great." But I think in business the same is true for trying to make a positive impact: "If you aren't trying to change peoples lives for the better, you won't even affect them positively."

10/22/23

I've met people with 9 figure net worths and plenty more with 8+ figures. None of them have really impressed me with their level of ambition. I've never met someone who either thought they could meaningfully contribute to a problem of humanity or become the top .01% of their field. Truly elite.

10/28/23

Judgement and understanding have to add up to 100%. Therefore if you have any judgement, you don't understand it all.

11/17/23

"Be ruthless about what you ignore. Time, energy, and resources are so precious. You have to be ferocious about cutting your priorities, more than you realize and certainly more than is comfortable.

You can only deeply commit to a few things. One or two? Maybe three?

Every pretty good, sorta nice, kinda fun thing you abandon is like shedding a weighted vest that lets you move at top speed. You were so busy focusing on how much you could carry, you never realized you could run this fast."

Things that waste my time and energy: alcohol, caffeine, social media.

We overestimate the knowledge that we need to do something. Most of the learning happens when we actually do it.

It's ironic how most things in life are simple, but hard. Getting in shape, finding a diet that works for you, getting good sleep, achieving at least mediocre business success. It's simple things that if you do over a long time horizon achieve the outcome you desire. I know if for the next 5 years I work 6 days a week for 10-12 hours a day, write down the day before what needs to be done, check in quarterly with myself, workout and spend time with my friends and family at night, only eat whole foods, that I will be rich, fit, and very likely to be happy.

Just cutting out the vices would make 80% of the progress I think (no ultra processed foods, caffeine, alcohol, weed, or gambling). If we want people to be better versions of themselves why advertise things that make them worse off.

What you can do today, do not leave to tomorrow. FASTER is better in almost every circumstance. Accelerate your decision making, your execution.

"Time is the denominator." - Brett Adcock

11/20/23

Why don't we have a class in middle school or high school that has the kid dedicated to making $1,000 in the semester? Then each kid explains how they went about it. This would be empowering kids instead of institutionalizing.

12/3/23

I feel like I kind of had an "aha moment." Is focus in and of itself enjoyable? Is that what most of us are trying to do? We want the ability to focus and not be bounced around like a pinball machine. Is that actually maybe a reason why anxiety and depression is up? We go from one thing to the next, and now we have lost all ability to focus, and it seems that is the most enjoyable state one can be in. Focusing on a blade of grass without thinking or playing basketball or working on something intensely. These are all examples of simply flow state, and now with all the distractions we miss flow state. If we have the ability to enter flow state whenever, then do we have access to well being whenever too?

12/4/23

Most people think suffering is not getting what you want, or your expectations don't meet reality. While there is use to this definition, it's missing the point. The underlying factor is there is dissonance in the nervous system. Symmetry in the nervous system is pleasurable, and dissonance is suffering. My current hypothesis is the amount of suffering one feels is based on the sum of dissonance that happens within their nervous system. The amount of joy one feels is the amount of harmony or symmetry there is within the whole nervous system. There is an actual geometry to experience (bumpy, smooth, clunky, etc).

Throughout the day your mind will go from one thing to the next. Mostly it will move smoothly, but then sometimes it comes back to something. It seems unresolved. This is a "clench" moment of the mind. This is the beginning of dissonance. Now why I think people are becoming more anxious/depressed is multifaceted, but one contributor is we have massively increased the amount of moments that happen throughout the day, which increases the amount of clenching that can happen. Technology increases the amount of context switching and our mind is not properly adapted to this.

The opposite would be flow state... Our mind and body is in sync with one task, and that in and of itself is pleasurable.

12/23/23

Part of maturity is paying attention to your organs just as much as your mind. Your mind has 1/n decision power but most people give it 1/1.

Relationships compound closer to an exponential route than linear route in time you spend together and vulnerability you both show.

But showing vulnerability from the last 6 months plays a much larger role than when you showed it 6 years ago. This is why relationships have to continue with the way they started to make it good. Dating is a verb. Marriage is a noun. That's the main distinction.

Gather skills you can't hire for.

If they can train you for a role, it's not valuable.

Hire for passion and intensity.

Determination and speed are the best traits combined with intellect and curiosity. Pair those with high integrity. And then work with those people for a lifetime.

"And like every day is day one. Every day you are deciding what you're gonna do." - Jeff Bezos

Over the next 10-20 years, the only 2 things that really matter is increasing intelligence (AI) and understanding consciousness/neuroscience, which will increase well being beyond ways we understand.

View everything as a skill, and every skill is like a muscle. You build it through progressive overload.

The most overlooked skill in life is attention. You build it through meditation, but also other things affect it. Diet, exercise, sleep etc.

When your sensory clarity goes up, it becomes very clear that your digestion and thoughts are related. And you become very picky about what you consume.

2024

1/7/24

It seems like the potential end game of technology could be reverting back to our hunter-gatherer society without the clear hardships our ancestors experienced.

Work 4-6 hours a day, move our bodies, play with our tribe, sleep with the rhythm of the sun. But not have to deal with disease, worrying about our next meal. We ultimately stop focusing so much on productivity, and more emphasis on well-being.

1/8/24

It's easier to be a man that doesn't give a fuck vs a woman. I seem to actively get compliments on it, and people seem to be attracted to it. For a woman, it seems to get a very different response, sometimes complete opposite.

57% of Americans never live anywhere else than the state they are born. That's a pretty wild statistic and shows how most people are pretty low agency. Also makes you respect people who move countries.

1/9/24

The most obvious benefit of designing my home to make it easy for me to make the best decision is that I don't have to hold tension on making the right decision. When trying to build a new habit or break a bad one, you have to hold tension constantly to "make it happen." When you design the home to make it easy, these decisions are straightforward and in front of you. I don't have to make as many decisions, which is really nice because my mind/body only has a finite amount of resources for that.

The most dangerous people in high tech societies are high agency people with low amount of principles/ethics or haven't fully developed them.

Building what the market wants can be a dangerous game when most people don't know how to get what they want. And better yet, what they think will get them what they want isn't actually the thing that gets them what they want. People just want to feel good I think, and they haven't trained enough to notice what makes them feel good.

If you just build what the market wants, you'll end up with sex bots.

America will tweet any little progress that happens, meanwhile China builds an entire city in 5 years, 40 nuclear reactors under construction, and has connected the whole country with high speed railways, basically all in silence.

This makes me bullish on startup cities, which would create more variation of experiments to see what works for people. It would create more community/tribes, smaller cities will have more autonomy over their life rather than a big federal government telling them what to do. It would be fast pace with iterations happening at 100x the current speed.

1/10/24

"You are the product of your attention."

Being high agency only matters when you know what you want.

1/12/24

It's basically required to ignore 99.9% of people on their calibration of risk if you want to do anything special or outside the ordinary.

1/15/24

More startup cities = closer to utopia.

"The start of startup cities. From the two-party system to the n-city system."

1/18/24

Playing a character has a slight tension to it if you pay attention. On TV you can see almost everyone doing it, but when on a podcast they aren't (at least the good ones aren't). The subtle cues are almost indescribable. Like you are just picking up the vibe through the screen. People are more stiff on TV, more controlled like they are trying to hold tension to put them into a higher entertainment or professionalism state.

I'm 25 and I kind of still fuck with the idea of just asking friends "hey want to play today?" It's like setting the mood for hanging out.

Calmness is a lack of mental and physical tension.

Is introversion a result of holding tension while being around people?

1/19/24

The biggest productivity gain of AI will be that there will be smaller teams. Smaller teams move faster, have less bureaucracy. Things just get done faster.

1/22/24

When I wake up in the middle of the night from a dream. I have random ass thoughts, non coherent most of the time. I wonder if it's because my brain is still in a REM state and just bouncing off the walls still.

1/26/24

Meditation is playing around with the attentional field (jhana), or not playing at all (open awareness).

If you think meditation is boring I'd try to play more with energy and attention.

If you think meditation is overwhelming then I'd try to sit in open awareness.

1/30/24

I went to a college prep high school, then dropped out of college.

My high school was more fun than college in terms of just academics. We had a "January term" where we got to pick a topic to learn about for the whole month of January.

It makes me think that we could probably just teach everything in a much shorter amount of time and have it be way more fun.

Intention matters when measuring character, but it does not measure outcomes.

I created an algorithm that calculates expected value for sports betting. I found that people end up gambling more after even though we clearly gave them only Positive EV bets. Even with proof that you can make 3-4k/month consistently if you just stick with the math, but people couldn't/didn't want to.

It was a really stark reminder that humans aren't very rational even for their own needs and that gambling has nothing to do with making money, it has to do with feeling something.

2/5/24

If you don't see an example of what you want to be, then be it. Show others it's possible. The 4 minute mile took forever to get broken, then once humans figured they could, then it was happening all the time. You can be calm, joyful, off of stimulants, and wildly useful, successful, and motivated (just for different reasons) at the SAME DAMN TIME.

2/7/24

I've been listening to Vivaldi, and it's the first time I've listened to classical music, and the first time I've listened to music without words. And it's very interesting to me how music, emotions, and stories seem to all be very tightly intertwined. When I listen to the music, I feel certain emotions. It's more visceral, like I can feel it in my body. It's not masked by a monologue that's happening in my head. And at the same time, when I'm listening to the music evolve throughout the song, it's like I picture stories. And it's not like the stories have any words in them, which is really interesting. It's like I can see this person in this storyline connected to this song, but there's no words involved, it's just actions.

When you're starting a company or trying to do something new, one of the most valuable things is someone that can think in multiple perspectives.

This is why learning to steelman the opposite side of yours in an argument is valuable, especially if you're a business owner.

The biggest changes that you can make in your business or the highest leverage decisions will come from perspective changes.

2/28/24

The difference between constant thinking and a quiet/calm mind is probably the equivalent of 2-3 hours of sleep. A lot of the benefit of meditation might be that when you increase bottom up processing, then the body/mind organizes itself to a harmonic state.

Thoughts and storytelling is top down of the mind. This is energy intensive. It's exhausting to think a lot.

Noticing sensations is bottom up. This is energy inducing. What's interesting is if you just pay attention to the sensations you build up enough energy where it's very pleasant. There is something happening there where the body self organizes into a pleasant state if you are able to hold attention long enough.

I sort of think that the modern day sin is everything seems to be activating our top down system. Walking in nature, hanging with friends, working out, dancing etc are more bottom up activities.

3/4/24

Noticing restlessness subside is one of the most powerful realizations you have. And after you have that realization, it's a skill you can develop way more than people think.

My anxiety was never about the existential worries it turns out. It was the same as anything else. Aversion and grasping. A certain idea had my mind held up on something. And then it continued in this held upness state which is both grasping and aversion. But it was never about the philosophical idea. It could have been anything. And how you stop that is not just trying to come up with a better explanation but being able to feel joy and also not tense the mind or body.

10/25/24

There is nothing worse than not maximizing an opportunity. You are given a chance by the universe and you squander it. Thinking they come around often is a mistake. Most of your work will seem pointless until these come along. You must continue to work hard and when it comes along, you double down, which may seem impossible, but it's not. You just do it.

If you take spaced repetition learning seriously, it will change your life.

11/12/24

I get distracted thinking about the future. About trying to gather all the info. To have some type of vision of what it will look like. It helps me a little, and I think it's valuable to some degree, but once you get the message, then put down the phone.

I don't think I should settle for who I am right now. I think I should still strive. There is much improvement to be done. And once I'm there, there is an active management of staying there. It's not that I'm always striving and need something more. But I shouldn't just rationalize where I am now. At the same time regretting over the past is quite literally the stupidest thing. Like it's over. You are here now. Do what you have to do. Learn from it and move on.

I need to take this time seriously. I have a huge opportunity right now. This is the time to grind. See how hard I can push myself. Starting now. If something goes off track and I fuck up something don't wait till tomorrow. Start again right now. If I ate a chip, don't just say "fuck it" and keep eating them. Just stop them. Throw away the chip you have in your hand. It's literally training yourself to not do that. Be a good ancestor to yourself first, then your family, and then humanity and conscious existence.

12/21/24

I'm feeling a combination of hope and shame. Shame that I'm not working enough. Shame that I don't feel like I am put together. Shame that I haven't stuck to my word a lot of the time. Shame of how little I've accomplished at 26.

Momentum is everything. When I was succeeding and I was focused and I was doing these things, it's like, yeah, I'm doing those things and I'm accomplishing it. But I want to just keep being that person. It's not even so much that I want all the accomplishment. Although I still do. But it's really just about being that person. And that momentum never stops if you become that person.

I haven't managed my mind well recently. Really just my current mind state decides every decision. And that's not good. At my peak, it was nothing like that.

I'm hoping that this is a turning point. Nothing to sulk about. But just push me into action.

2025

2/3/25

I have been coming to the realization that the mind cannot be fully trusted. They are just thoughts after all, why would you trust every single one?

It's like I'm going to trust a reasoning model over a non-reasoning one.

System 1 thinking is like next token prediction, it can do really good things, but it's surely not as robust as system 2 thinking.

The system 1 mind will rationalize anything. It is quite spectacular how it wants to jump to every impulse.

"One more time." "You won't do it again after this. It's alright." "We can start after this one thing." "Let me check social media real quick." "What's the latest news." "I'm learning right now. This is clearly useful!"

I am starting an experiment of trying to completely outlaw system 1 from making critical decisions like planning and what to do in this instant. Especially things health and work related. I will not allow system 1 mind to decide what I eat, what I should work on, how to allocate 90% of my time.

Here are the 11 things that must be done everyday:

Write down 2-3 main priorities for the day
Wake up ~6
Run each morning (this can be super short like 5m)
No junk food
4+ hours of focused work
Workout + stretch (morning run does not count)
No food after 6pm
Write 30m/day about anything (business, life, execution plans)
Meditate 10m+
No social media before 7:30pm
Read 10 pages

In many ways life is so much harder when you don't automate things. Not just in a practical sense of the things you can handle in your job, but even morally.

I want to strive to be virtuous. It's also insanely time consuming if you really want to analyze every decision. That's why I think it's smart to incorporate AI to automate a lot of this decision making. At the end of the day the reason I want to automate these things is not to feel wholesome. It's because there is actual suffering and if I'm the other side of that I wouldn't care how the person feels, I just would want it to stop.

2/5/25

I'm going to adjust it to 15m/day instead of 30m/day because simply it seems easier. If I put in 15m/day I'm more likely to write 45m than if I do 30m/day. The 30m/day for me feels like a requirement, and once I meet it I'm done. 15m feels more like allowing myself to get past the initial agitation of writing and get into flow.

I can feel the urge to run away from the tension. And if I just sit with it or move on with it, then the tension drops still, but I don't have to look for a distraction. Buddhism actually makes sense in these moments.

Wow it's actually crazy how much you get done when you truly focus for 10-11 hours. One thing I think helps me that I tried today is logging what I do each hour. I just put a timer on for 60m and then at the end I just type for 5-30 seconds what I did. Keeps me honest, and it's sort of a game to see how much I got done.

It shows you that agency and actually just wanting to do things is the barrier now. Which is great because it empowers those that want to put things into the world they want to see. I do think this is a short period of still having to put in the work to some degree. It's like there is going to be this 5 year period where the builders are going to love their life. And then it will be weird because AI will be better at building, and many people that have not purely enjoyed it, but identified with it will struggle.

2/6/25

I can't wait for the day we understand genetics and valence and can genetically engineer animals to make sure they aren't suffering. It's wild to think about that everything evolved to survive and whether that lead them to pure joy or suffering is irrelevant in the eyes of evolution.

If you don't know where the animal you ate came from, then you don't care. You aren't honoring it. I'm not even advocating for being a vegetarian, but if you are going to kill an animal or use its resources then I think that's an overlook.

Won't it be sick once we actually figure out diet instead of how schizo it is right now.

People say "associate" a lot when they mean "correlate." Associate sounds like you know something, correlate is admitting you don't.

It's quite true that AI at this point is at least better at taking care of yourself than you are. Not super intelligent, but for 99.99% of people it's better (I quite literally mean 99.99%).

2/7/25

AI is insane, computers are insane, space is insane, this whole universe is insane. Like what the fuck.

I'm typing on a keyboard and it sends electrical signals into chips with billions of transistors flipping back and forth, and then it magically does stuff on my computer. And that's considered simple today!

As I'm typing there are electrical signals zapping around in my brain connecting billions of neurons, trillions of synapses. People I have never met, only through Twitter, have literal electrical signals in their brain that have a "stored" Connor just waiting to be activated. Seriously what the fuck.

Thinking of the complexity of getting a simple Amazon package to you will make it feel like the 8th wonder of the world.

2/9/25

Isn't it wild that humans can act? That we can tense ourselves into certain shapes. I'm not a shy person, but I think of a moment when I was embarrassed and timid, and then I can feel that moment. I can feel what that person felt. I can be that person. I don't know why, but it makes me wonder what it felt like to be the Buddha, or to be Hitler. Not in an envy type of way, but to understand the range of experience. I feel we all underestimate how much range of conscious experience there is because we only understand our own range.

2/10/25

If you buy a course at this point off the internet, it's probably just a low agency move. Just use AI + Twitter + YouTube.

2/11/25

I think people will look back at our health studies and think they were wack because isolating 1 point is sort of stupid in a multivariate system. You really do need to understand how it works to reach conclusions.

Honestly I think I'm at the point where I'd rather have AI make most decisions for me that are health related. I don't want to think about it. Just optimize my health, check the results, iterate, and continue.

3/2/25

We need to make something optimized to have your back. That's it. Everything is made with either negative regard or no regard to how it affects you. Foods made to make you feel like shit. Social media that only cares if you keep scrolling. This product is made to make you better. The dream is that it protects you without even telling you. It helps you become your best self.

Nov 2025

Systems should run without you. If they need you, they're not systems yet.

Compress hard, then decompress completely. No steady-state productivity theater.

Dec 2025

Environment design over willpower. Automations over intentions. Binary rules over moderation.

The best delegation makes you unnecessary for the outcome. Not invisible, unnecessary.

Courage is more scarce than genius.